blurbage

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wow. you know, i always hated blurbs. i have to wonder what the point is… who–if anyone–it convinces of, what? anything??

did you know that publishing houses, when requesting book blurbs, will send their own write-up for the person to “okay it” and write off as their own words? hmm. i did not know that until recently. it’s making more sense now why i have failed at fully embracing this practice in book marketing.

luckily, i have only been asked to write blurbs a few times by authors/poets clearly confused. it gives me a good chuckle to know that the publisher has always known best and said — oh, just use that one on the web. here’s one that i can honestly stand by though…

April Michelle Bratten’s poetry does not pretend. It does not put on airs; it is exquisite. Her relationship to the word is careful and creative but she leaves room for the reader to interpret, to draw their own conclusions, to have a moment to themselves inside the thoughts of another. It is so rare to find this in a poet—willing to stand aside from any platform and simply bear witness.

– Michele McDannold, founding editor and publisher at Citizens for Decent Literature

It Broke Anyway by April Michelle Bratten (NeoPoiesis Press) http://www.neopoiesispress.com/12401/100134.html

I really started to fall in love with April’s poetry several years ago. This poem from Red Fez, “Legs,” (http://www.redfez.net/poetry/1119) was one of my favorites from my feztime. and as with all things good, it eventually led to more goodness when April sent some kickass poems to me at Citizens and we ended up with this fun little book.

"Drink This" little book by April Michelle Bratten (Citizens for Decent Literature Press) photo by Wanda Morrow Clevenger

“Drink This” little book by April Michelle Bratten (Citizens for Decent Literature Press) photo by Wanda Morrow Clevenger

anywho. the best explanation/thoughts about blurbs i have ever heard came from BUD SMITH. supersmart and funny guy. he probably wrote an article about it or will if you ask him, so hit him up http://budsmithwrites.com/

he was also very kind when i sent him this as the LU’s “book blurb” for EVERYTHING NEON

The Literary Underground cannot officially endorse the use of book blurbs, hyperbole, and most especially not cheese plates at poetry readings. We are pleased to support and promote the use of the internet search engine of your choice for finding and reading any and all Bud Smith writes/writing/poetry/flash/shorts/novels.. twitters, even. It’s all good. If that doesn’t convince you to buy his latest book of poetry “Everything Neon”, then I don’t know what to say for you. You’re going to DIE! QUICK! GOOGLE!! NOW!!!

another one i can stand by. seriously, what are you waiting for? http://www.amazon.com/Everything-Neon-Bud-Smith/dp/0615980783
you can even get it on Kindle, if you’re into that sort of thing.

anyway, my point is… the “underground” does everything better! not hyperbole at all!! it’s TRUE!!! #truefuckingstory

i am embracing this process because why the fuck not. these guys rock…

here’s a couple of blurbishes that recently came in for my upcoming book Stealing the Midnight from a Handful of Days from PUNK HOSTAGE PRESS

Photograph by Jinn; Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5.

Photograph by Jinn; Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5.

 

 

 

 

good monday morning Michele!! enjoyed your new book immensely thoroughly!! here’s back cover punk poem blurb!! thanks for asking!! 
Ron 

 

talk to me

as i lay me down to sleep i pray the lord
my soul to keep if i die before i wake i pray
the lord my soul to take my soul to take my soul

talk to me whisper in my ears words i can’t possibly understand
sing all night as we speed from springfield to las vegas do your
patti smith poet punk fuck you scream in dutch to telephone
poles mowing them down with electric guitar never more than
four chords as we plummet south talk to me whisper in
my ears words i can’t possibly understand sing all night
as we speed from las vegas to hollywood do your michele mcdannold
stealing the midnight from a handful of days punk hostage press 
fuck you scream in arabic to telephone poles 
mowing them down with electric guitar never more
than four chords as we plummet south talk to me talk to me
whisper in my ears talk to me whisper whisper whisper 

–ron whitehead, outlaw poet GONZO master
copyright (c) 2014 ron whitehead

 

catfinger400

Catfish McDaris

Michy McDannold is a great writer from the Land of Lincoln. Her words are poignant, sad, happy, insightful, and full of emotion. Most important they make you think and they stick with you like biscuits and gravy. When I read her poems I feel her love and I’m glad I had the pleasure of meeting and reading with her in person. Michele’s energy is what drives the small press and keeps it alive and vibrant. I recommend you buy her book, all you cheapskate motherfuckers.” –Catfish McDaris

 

that last line, yo. got a good kick out of that. you’ll have your chance, if you make it to the THIS IS POETRY event where my book is being released as well as the first volume of TIP as well as a kickass band as well as drag queen karaoake as well as…

event-banner2

**TOP SECRET SECRET** the lineup is starting to take shape: RON WHITEHEAD & RYDER COLLINS !!!!!! can i get a whoop whoop?!?

see you there! https://www.facebook.com/events/693710787357846/

 

 

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new use for the coin jar?

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Father-Guido-Sarducci LIFE IS A JOB

thank you, Father Guido. 35cents, good to know. just a guess (and I’m not judging) but I think I know a few people that must have a pretty big coin jar. not me, of course. I don’t even know what Father Guido is talking about. my ‘big bad’ lately is not updating this blog. Sinful, I know. but, here’s why…

Rule #1 No Stabbing No Killing (and can't say it)Please, dear universe–send the teens back to school. This latest rule seemed both worthy of rule #1 status and necessary to my very survival. and the teens survival. It’s adoption has led to many “conversations” involving I’M GOING TO (stutter stutter stutter) kick you in the face (or similar), whatever, get away from me.

If I hear WOW! Can you not? one. more. freaking time. #digme?

can you tell i'm not listening (meme)on another note..

i heart BookTv for its nap-inducing qualities. Every now and then, though, there’s some interesting stuff on there. this one, about the Self-Publishing Expo …might cause yawning for the presentation, but there is a lot of good information in here or i’m just a big nerd, whatever. http://www.booktv.org/Watch/15314/Self+Publishing+Book+Expo.aspx

along those lines, there is a new article on Writer’s Digest.com by James H. Duncan, founding editor of Hobo Camp Review, called “When Authors Become Publishers: Creating A DIY Literary Anthology”. He talks with poet/author/editor/publisher/radio show host/all-around-cool guy Bud Smith about his work with Uno Kudo, Kleft Jaw, Unknown Press, and others. http://www.writersdigest.com/editor-blogs/there-are-no-rules/when-authors-become-publishers-creating-a-diy-literary-anthology

One of the questions I am asked over and over again is how do you handle rejecting work submitted from friends or people you know. not very well– would be my first answer. I have changed my stance on this several times over the years, and, finally- came to the realization that it doesn’t matter how you handle it. You could be golden, ingenious with your response… someone will get pissy over it. Such is life.

You just gotta suck it up like Mr. Bill here…and roll with the punches the best you can

one last thing, if you can stop masturbating for just a second. (seriously, i’m not judging)

check out this great tumblr blog by William Seward Bonnie. He’s been running this blog and posting poetry on a regular basis for some time. good stuff, cool guy. i mean, he wears a lion coat for fuck’s sake.

if you dig it, gather a few of those coins you’re saving from not spending ALL of your online time with internet porn, and maybe donate a little bit to keep the Cheeseburger Nebula going.

WSB

 

Does anyone understand Tumblr?

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Bud Smith Barbies Books

Why is there a pile of naked barbies with these Bud Smith books on the kitchen table?
I really have no explanation for this.

random page from Everything Neon (beautiful cover, right?)

Youth

When we were little
our mutual dream
was to slam dunk
so hard
we’d shatter
the glass backboard
That was it
Our whole dream
and now
here we are

(c)Bud Smith

http://budsmithwrites.com/

also trying to understand tumblr. I am, maybe, too old. ?? but, I am trying because of this http://thisispoetry.tumblr.com/

This is Poetry

top secret stuff happening there. ssshhhhh
it seems the tags are very important.

The 10 most popular tags on Tumblr (June 2012)

 

 

 

 

 

i also came across this which has a nice cheat sheet for facebook photo sizes.. Facebook Photos Size Guide: Dimensions & Types (2014 Edition) which is also the reason my computer is about full up of the same image resized a bazillion times just to post crap on facebook. different for all the other social media whatnots too… if you don’t want to end up with an oddly reshaped or cropped photo… i mean, just look at what happened to this photo of Dr. Timothy Murrae (of the BLot Lit gang)from a recent book signing…

misshapen

finally, all of this… I don’t really know what’s going on most of the time, but sometimes it works anyway.

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